Ashes -- version 2

[rabidsamfan]

I had to save you.

I hear your voice, and you are glad that the task is done, but I cannot rejoice. I’ve nothing left inside.

I didn’t let you fall.

But there’s nowhere left to go, except a few more feet up this bit of rock. That won’t be enough. The mountain is destroying itself, same as it destroyed the Ring.

I couldn’t let you fall.

I called to you. You reached for me. I had to pull you up. And still we are dying, and my head aches and my heart is numb.

Why can’t I save you?



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Comments

[elendiari22.livejournal.com]

Oh, this is so sad! Thanks for sharing!

[rabidsamfan.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I think re-writing helped it actually, even though I didn't end up changing what got critiqued, LoL!

And I gave up and just made myself a new icon to "illustrate" it now.

[elendiari22.livejournal.com]

I love that icon, it really illustrates it well.

[gwaith.livejournal.com]

This breaks my heart.

Beautiful, beautiful drabble. Sigh.

[rabidsamfan.livejournal.com]

Thank you. *checks stock ticker for price on Kleenex company*

[rosiegardener.livejournal.com]

oh dear, that makes me want to hug poor Sam, powerful words and a good icon to match

[rabidsamfan.livejournal.com]

He's so tired in that scene. You can just see it. And you can thank shadowfax8 for providing the lovely screencaps that gave me both the inspiration and the icon!

[lame-pegasus.livejournal.com]

Perfect. Now it's perfect. And now that d... sentence is placed exactly where it has to be. Both Times. Yay!

*very big grin*

*very big hug*

[rabidsamfan.livejournal.com]

Thank you for encouraging me to re-write it!

[pippinswolf.livejournal.com]

Dear Sam, taking it so much to heart...

[rabidsamfan.livejournal.com]

He does that, doesn't he?

[teasel.livejournal.com]

Lovely rewrite! An already powerful piece is even more powerful. You do know exactly what you're doing. *admires you*

[rabidsamfan.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Your comments on the first draft were very helpful! I wish I did know exactly what I was doing -- everything would come out perfect the first time. *sigh* But on the other hand I'd miss the joy of wrangling the words and realizing just what it was I meant to do in the first place and how I need to revise to accomplish it.

[rubynye.livejournal.com]

OMG, what you've done in 100 words, omg. omg.

*waves arms incoherentlty*

[rabidsamfan.livejournal.com]

Thank you. Although this one had a bit of help from the picture...